Before I was a Mom

Came across this beautiful poem, which end up with me having watery eyes.... Damn these hormones....!



Before I was a Mom


Before I was a Mom,
I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby.
I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.


Before I was a Mom,
I had never been puked on.
Pooped on. Chewed on. Peed on.
I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts.
I slept all night.


Before I was a Mom,
I never held down a screaming child so doctors could do tests.
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.


Before I was a Mom,
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put her down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.


Before I was a Mom,
I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond between a mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.


Before I was a Mom,
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth,
the joy,
the love,
the heartache,
the wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mom.
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much,
before I was a Mom ...

Idle

Oh wow… how time flies… just look how long I’ve neglected my blog…

I missed being here..
I missed letting out what’ve bottled up inside me…
I missed how good it feels after grumbling about something that irritates me…
I missed everything that I left here….

but most of all… I missed writing bout Lya… I missed smiling back to what I’ve written bout her… just cant get myself to the thought that I’ve missed writing on how she grows up, and God knows how she grew up soooo fast.. that I’ve missed to ‘record’ it… that I might forget the day every time she makes a new move… … that I just cant look back and read about her bcoz I’ve neglected engraving it somewhere…

Mummy's pumpkin

Fun @ the Peak...!

It was a fun weekend.... I have no chance to upload photos @ ulu yam, now I have lots of photos @ genting waiting for me to upload.... anyways, it was a short & sweet 2 day 1 nite trip with Lya and another 2 families.... Lya suka sangat...! We had few round trip naik kuda pusing2 tu.... coz she liked it soooo much...

This is the only full body photo of me that i like.. coz the rest of the photos, I looked FAT...! hahaaa.... Anyways,nice shots, honey.... tak rugi beli lense tu.. hehehe....

Naaa... All the photos are uploaded into Fame's laptop, and @ home, I'm too bz with Lya.... that I could not afford to update my blog... hehe...

me & Lya @ chocolate factory...

Lya naik elephant...!

Careful, Lya....

Paintball @ The Woods

Meet Mr & Mrs Smith versi gumuk.. hahahaa....

Had a blasts weekend... We went to The Woods at UluYam... and played paintball for the 1st time... Not bad.. definitely gonna play again if we had the chance.... tapi lebam2 gak la 4-5 bijik kat badan... sakitnye sampai arini... the most painful kena kat haku sebijik headshot.. selepuk kat muka.. even kena kat facemask, tapi mask tu berlubang2, amikk kau... terasa paintball tu ditapis masuk ke dalam mulut ku... ewwww.... baru le merasa experience telan paint....

The battle field......

Team mate + opponents... good game, guys...

Kitorang menang woooo... tak caya tengok score team BANZAI tu haaa....

after main kat field, diorg main dlm hutan pulak.. lagi le mencabar agaknye, but kitorg tak join since cik Lya dah tunggu mummy & daddy dia, nak mandi sungai... sampai biru2 bibir budak sorg tu mandi kat ulu yam... tapi takmo naik jugak..... will upload photos of Lya later....

Should I or Shouldn't I?

I’m in dilemma here….

I’ve been using my Medela Mini Electric Plus for about one year now… Well it’s not actually mine.. its my sister’s… And it served me well for the past one year.. I was able to pump at work twice a day, without consuming much time (well, it’s a double pumping system… that contributes for short time pumping sessions). Overall, I am totally satisfied with it… (except for the irritating noise it makes..) I have sent it for service only once for the whole year.. and my sister has used it for about one year before she passed it to me after Lya’s borned….

Mini Electric Plus Along yg byk berjasa.. hehe...

Now that she’s expecting her new addition in April.. I’m in dilemma… She needs the pump too… its either I have to stop pumping at work… and just continue to breastfeed Lya only at nights.. (which I’m reluctant to, since she’s only 1 yr 1 month now, and my target is to pump at least until she reaches 2 yrs old) or Should I get another pump? I went to Medela Service Centre in Ampang last week and was totally amazed when I tried this demo set, and from then since, it has become one of items in my wish list… it works and feels exactly like natural baby’s sucking rhythm (Only bf mothers would understand this…!)

I love this...!

Should I buy it now? Since Medela has announced that the price will increase RM200 in 2 weeks time… but, this model costs a bomb! More than RM1k ….! Is it worth it if I buy it now? Gosh... If only i have lotsssss of extra $$$$......

"Cemane aa, Lya?"

" Tah la Mummy.. Lya pon tade duit nak bagi Mummy....

Pray for the Palestinians...

I'm just speechless..... Couldnt even imagine if we were at their place... Allah, please help them....


"Ya Allah!! Sebagaimana Engkau Pernah menghantar burung-burung ababil menghancurkan tentera bergajah Musyrikin, maka kami memohon kepada mu Ya Allah....... . turunkan lah bantuan mu kali ini kepada orang orang Islam di Palestin, hancurkanlah rejim zionis..amin. ...."